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1: I currently use a key ring that displays photographs of a beautiful and talented single-named pop vocalist whose name ends in an ‘a’. But who?
a) Martika
b) Shakira
c) Madonna
2. In 2005 I was given a boiled sweet by an old Japanese lady as a reward for my excellent accent when speaking her language. What had she overheard me saying?
a) I was remarking on the attractiveness of a nearby deer
b) I was asking for directions to the nearest art gallery
c) I was purchasing a train ticket
3. When I met the Queen (Elizabeth (II)) what did she say before and after seeing me?
a) “Can we finish soon? I’m starving” then “I seriously need a sandwich”
b) “Where are all the boys?” then “Oh…THERE you are…”
c) “What’s that smell?” then “Students…”
4. Which of the following groups of objects have, at different times, attacked and/or injured me?
a) A goat; A Russian casino owner
b) A broken unicycle; The Yellow Pages
c) A German boy scout; A windmill
5. When I was hit by a car and knocked off my bike while in my early teens, why was the experience all the more frightening?
a) The car’s appearance matched the description of a vehicle we had been warned was following children on bikes and trying to abduct them
b) I was being chased by a dog at the time
c) The bike was stolen and I thought it was the police
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